What does the phrase “you are enough” really mean and why do many of us find it so hard to accept?
In this post, I’ll share some insights as to why you are enough and how you can start feeling good enough as you are.
And the best bit?
You don’t have to be a millionaire, a super model, or achieve all your goals to get there.
You Are Enough Meaning
This common phrase is popularised by many self-help teachers who tell us that we should accept ourselves as we are.
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The truth is, it does’t matter who you are, who’s in your social circle, or what you’ve achieved, you are good enough and equal to everyone.
But, to understand this saying on a deeper level, let’s look at the definition of the word enough.
1. adequate for the want or need; sufficient for the purpose or to satisfy desire.
It comes from old English and is translated from genōg, which is of Germanic origin and means sufficient.
Also, synonyms from Thesuarus.com include, abundant, full, and adequate.
All these words have something in common and that is they define a scale of messurement. Meaning, to be enough is something we messure against something of value.
Therefore we can loosely define being good enough with self-worth or a feeling of being valuable.
Problems occur when we start defining our worth by our accomplishments, our looks, or by our career.
To strive towards greater things and improve ourselves is a healthy way of being.
But when we say things like “I’m not good enough” or “I’m too old”, we are making excuses due to the way we feel about ourselves.
If we base our worthiness on what we do or how we look, we will never feel good enough because these things never last.
What Makes Us Think We Aren’t Enough?
“I’m not enough is a universal problem that we pick up very early in our life because we start to compare ourselves to other people.” – Marisa Peer
In this short video, award winning therapist Marisa Peer talks about the origin of why we think we aren’t good enough.
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The simple answer is that it’s a common belief in western society that to be enough, we need to be like others who seem to have it all, who are attractive, have financial wealth, or have incredible confidence.
The cause of not feeling enough or worthy is in the comparisons we make of ourselves against other people.
But the flaw in this thinking is that some people have everything they want in life, yet still experience feelings of unworthiness.
And lots of people with very little, have a fantastic sense of worthiness.
It is simply a false belief we have picked up from society because being like others makes us feel a sense of belonging.
How to Start Feeling Good Enough
Here are just a few ways you can start feeling better about yourself and use the power of your mind to feel more successful in life right now:
1. Look at Your Mindset
To see things differently and experience more joy, we have to change our perspective on things.
Having a fixed belief that prevents us from moving forward means we have to change our beliefs before any real progress can be made.
If our mindset says I need to be in a relationship or live in the perfect house to be good enough, then we’re making our self-worth conditional.
Instead, we can believe we are good enough because we are human with interests, positive strengths, and the choice to be whoever we want to be.
2. Learn to Forgive yourself
Uncovering the way we’ve felt about ourselves over the years can sometimes makes us feel worse.
Therefore it’s important to remember to treat ourselves with self love and compassion.
It’s easy to get into negativity during this part of the journey, so learn to forgive yourself for it was not your fault, it simply wasn’t the right time for you to be aware of it.
3. Let Go of Past Mistakes
Letting go of the past can be hard, but it isn’t impossible.
When we acknowledge that we cannot change the past, but only change our story of the past and what we can do moving forward, any mistake we made will become a lesson to do things better in the present moment.
4. Use Affirmations
To start believing in the person you want to become, you can use affirmations to rewire your brain.
Listening to affirmations can raise our mood and help us see our strengths. The more we listen, the more we start to develop new thoughts about ourselves.
5. Quiet Your Inner Critic
We all have in inner critic that we developed in childhood. It is that authoritative inner parent that hijacks our thoughts and emotions.
This internal voice is often unconscious, yet has a huge impact on our self-worth and what we decide to do in life.
We can become aware of these negative thoughts by taking up meditation and reframe this inner voice with kinder thoughts and self care.
Recognise and Embrace Your Uniqueness
When you see the value in being your authentic self, you start to appreciate your differences and trust your own opinions.
Nothing you do in life will bring you true happiness, only who you are being.
It sets you on a path of healing from emotional pain and allowing new possibilities to happen. You stop comparing yourself to others and live life with more motivation.
When you embrace your uniqueness, your relationships improve, you look out for loved ones, and you see the world with new eyes.
All this then creates a feedback of feeling good enough for whoever you choose to become.
You are enough just as you are, but society can make us feel otherwise when we compare ourselves to others.
We can rewire our beliefs to start improving our self-worth and live a more fulfilling life.
To discover the eight transformations to live an epic life on your terms, take a look at Marisa’s free masterclass.